Nobody Likes You, Everybody Hates You

This site isn't really popular enough to start any type of campaign, nor am I political enough to really care to start something partisan-motivated.

But I am a jerk with a head for catchy tunes, so I started thinking it might be fun to send Joe Lieberman a bag full of worms to see if he would eat them. And if a whole bunch of people sent him worms, well, that would be real funny for obvious reasons.

Researching this little campaign, I learned a couple things.

1. The "Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me" song wasn't, in fact, created by The Kids In The Hall, although I can't say I ever heard the tune outside that show.

2. I didn't know the song had upwards of nine verses and/or five versions. Look at this:

Version I:
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,
Guess I'll go eat worms,
Long, thin, slimy ones; Short, fat, juicy ones,
Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms.

Down goes the first one, down goes the second one,
Oh how they wiggle and squirm.
Up comes the first one, up comes the second one,
Oh how they wiggle and squirm.

Version II
Nobody loves me, everybody hates me
Think I'll go and eat worms
Long ones, short ones, fat ones, thin ones
See how they wriggle and squirm

I bite off the heads, and suck out the juice
And throw the skins away
Nobody knows how fat I grow
On worms three times a day
Ohh...nobody loves me.

Version III:
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,
Think I'll go eat worms.
Big fat juicy ones, Eensie weensy squeensy ones,
See how they wiggle and squirm.

Chomp off their heads and squeeze out the juice
And throw their tails away
Nobody knows how I survive
On worms three times a day.

Version IV:
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me
I'm goin' down the garden to eat worms
Long thin slimy ones, short fat fuzzy ones
Ooey gooey, ooey gooey worms

Long thin slimy ones slip down easily
Short fat fuzzy ones don't
Short fat fuzzy ones stick to your teeth
And the juice goes slurpin' (slurping noise) down your throat

Version V:
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,
think I'll go eat worms...
big fat juicy ones, little slimy skinny ones,
hope they don't have germs!"

So, cursed by my own unpopularity, perhaps Joe Lieberman won't get bags and bags of worms in the mail. But at least I learned something today.